Couples Therapy

I am providing couples therapy in my practice in Aarhus.
Normally the therapy is spoken in danish, but for those couples who might have another international backgrund and are more fluent in english, I am offering the therapy in english, which i speak fluently.

My goal in couple and family therapy:

Helping people to be able to reach out to their closest relationships in a more flexible way when their individual attachment system is most activated.

In couples therapy, it is about helping couples establish new experiences no more explanations.

Couple therapy is not about AVOIDing difficult times, challenges, but allowing it to be ok to be together in the difficult emotional places, to establish new experiences together when both oarties are highly thriggered.

The most important tool of couples therapy: I help couples to have some new felt experiences. New experiences in how you can understand and meet each other in situations where you experience a very difficult moment with each other. I train the couple’s flexibility towards each other and inner compassion. The intrapsychic is linked to a greater degree with the interpersonal.

Couple therapy is not about AVOID difficult times, challenges, but to allow it to be ok to be together in the difficult emotional places, to establish some new experiences together that we can meet and exchange when it is most difficult between you. Helps extend tolerance. The goal of the therapy; expanding the capacity and tolerance to be with our emotions, helps to affect regulation.

During the couple therapy I help couples to gain new insight about them self and the negative patterns and provide new positive patterns, which can rebuild their relationship.

67% of all dissagreements will never be solved shows background studys, so the goal will not be to help couples to agree about everything, but instead accepting the differences.

And accept: everybody dissapoints each other sooner or later during their relationship.

Couples therapy is about the willingness to dare to open up to being vulnerable. In general people are fearing to begin the couple therapy. The treasure by time will be: knowing themselves and their close relationsship better and in a new way, knowing their innerlife better and knowing their own pattern and emotions better.

Many couples and families are super scared to talk openly about their problems, conflicts and disappointments over each other. For many, it is repressed emotions for years and a restless nervousness until one of the parties gently suggests couple therapy.

It is only natural that for many couples it can be associated with a trembling nervousness and discomfort to step into my practice in 90 minutes of couple or family therapy.

Fortunately, most people step out the door much more relieved, redeemed and optimistic when the session is over – and the decision on a course has been made.

Interested and want to know more or considering a course?

Feel free to be in contact with Hanne Kirkegaard

hej@hannekirkegaard.dk

Why choose couples therapy?

Making the choice to go to couples therapy can feel like a very big step. It involves admitting that things are not perfect in your partnership, which is often tough to do and scary to admit.

I’ ve outlined some common issues that indicate that a couple could potentially benefit from seeing a couples therapist.

1. Trust has been broken.

One of the most common reasons for seeking couples therapy is the need for help in overcoming a major breach of trust. Perhaps it was infidelity in the form of sex; perhaps it was an emotional affair; perhaps it was a series of lies. In any case, the rebuilding of the foundation of trust can often be helped by establishing a forum in which both parties are free to express their vulnerability.

2. Arguments are getting more frequent.

Do you notice that the rhythm of your day-to-day life is shifting to feel more conflict-oriented? Maybe they are all “small” arguments, or maybe the blowouts are huge and leaving a lot of drama in their wake. Either way, it’s the pattern of the increase that is important, which could indicate significant problems under the surface that aren’t really being dealt with.

3. Communication is poor.

Maybe overt conflict is not the problem, but you constantly feel misunderstood or ignored. Or maybe you feel like you don’t even have a good idea of what is happening with your partner emotionally as of late; he or she might as well be a stranger. Often, one of the most tangible outcomes of couples therapy is an increase in communication, and a major improvement in its quality.

4. Something definitely feels wrong, but you’re not sure what or why.

5. There is something you want your partner to know, but you’ve been unable to tell them.

Sometimes the beauty of therapy starts with the room itself: It can become a safe and supportive place for you to bring up things that are difficult to talk about in other settings.

6. You have gone through something devastating that is changing the way you connect with each other.

Many couples go their separate ways after the heartbreaking loss of a child, for instance. Other times, it’s long-term unemployment, a health crisis, or turmoil within one of the partner’s families of origin.

7. You feel stuck in bad patterns.

There is no limit to the number of patterns that partners develop in day-to-day life. Maybe a dysfunctional and unsatisfying pattern has been growing between you and your partner for years now. The longer a pattern sets in, however, the more energy and time it will take to change it. Best to start early.

8. Emotional intimacy is gone or deeply diminished.

9. Physical intimacy is a problem.

Sexual issues can be both a symptom and a cause of relationship problems. Sometimes the change is obvious and frustrating — a couple goes from frequent physical intimacy to almost none. Other times, it’s a gradual freeze from being fulfilled by each other sexually to barely being satisfied. Sometimes there is more overt conflict, with one partner expressing frustration, a partner constantly being rejected. Whatever the issue, a couples therapist can help you start working on it.

Why choose Hanne Kirkegaard as couples therapist?

You are very welcome to choose me as your couples therapist.
I have many years of experience as a therapist.

During the couple therapy I will give you new insight about your self and the patterns and provide new tools, which can rebuild your relationship.

Prises and terms

Read more HERE

Contact Hanne Kirkegaard by mail: hej@hannekirkegaard.dk or

call 29821911